The other day I came across this note I gave my husband a year ago February; he keeps it in his work-shirt pocket, transferring it to the next-day's shirt every evening (he'd left it on the dresser). To be honest, I love that he keeps it with him as a reminder of this journey we're still on together.
2/19/07
I hope you don't mind that God has been USING you,
and your self-destruction to bring me to the end of my own--
And the rebuilding of you to open my eyes to the Kingdom.
I was too scared to open my eyes before and feel the tension of trusting God!
Somehow, we've both said, "WHAT THE HELL!" and jumped
naked into the craziness of trusting God, and our eyes are being opened;
we're seeing what He's been trying to show us all along.
I'm glad to be here with you. It's this sober, not giddy love I have for you, and what's more--RESPECT! I hope you can finally respect me too.
I love you.
I remember that note: inspired words written on post-it notes, stuck to the bathroom mirror for him to find in the morning, because it was late at night and he was asleep when I wrote it. I was doing the dishes--one of my best times to reflect. I believe these words were not mine; I think they were God's heart speaking to mine. These few, post-it words speak volumes to me of God's opening my eyes to the reality of His incredible presence and loving authority in my life. I am a planting of the Lord... and what I mean by that is: He's got my back...so I know who I am, and I am not afraid to be so raw and real with my husband and with God. My husband has taken the same risk of being real with God, and I'm telling you, it's terrifying to stand naked before God. I now know why Adam and Eve freaked out and ran behind the bushes! But God has snatched us up and whisked us away on a crazy road of redemption and blessing that is so different--and most likely much better--than anything we could have thought would ever happen to us. It's baffling....
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